Things I Learned Working at the Mall Kiosk

Some people go to the mall all day. I’m talking 9 to 5 mall grazers. And they pace, all day long.

A vibrantly coloured matching sweat suit is dressing up to a lot of people.

Teen moms go to the mall for entertainment.

Mullets are in fact, still happening on heads all over Welland.

If you’re mean throughout the year, it doesn’t end at Christmas time.  You’re still surprisingly mean.

A lot of people can’t read, and they think signs for “2-4-1 Golf” really means “This is how much an entire membership costs!”

I am really good at Spider Solitaire.

I do not enjoy being coughed on, or around, or at.

People have very loud conversations about really stupid things.

Old men have no sense of personal space.

Old men have no sense of what a 27 year old woman (me) might find humourous 

(hint Old Man – it’s not your gross jokes about “quickies”)

Seeing old friends from elementary school is fun!

There are only so many trips to the “Dollarama” I can make.

Walking in circles around the kiosk does not kill as much time as you might think.

The internet gets surprisingly stale at about hour 5.

Not enough people are doing things on Facebook to entertain me.

Kids have big time meltdowns, and they aren’t fun to listen to.

When someone runs into you with a wheelchair, it hurts.

I am extremely bitter towards children 14 and under with better phones than me (I HATE YOU!)

Shriner hats make me giggle.

It's my last shift! HAPPY MALLIDAYS!

Good Night Equation

Good girl friends

+

Drinks (hot or cold, in a mug or martini glass)

+

Fun conversation

+

Comfort of a 15 year friendship

=

Great night!

________________________________________________________________

"Be slow to fall into friendship; but when thou art in, continue firm and constant."
- Socrates

Busy.... or Blessed?

I am SO busy.  

I know I'm not special, it's December, it's the Holidays - who isn't busy? 

(If you answered "me" I want to meet you immediately.)

Between family (we have SIX family Christmas's this year..... SIX!), spending time with friends, one husband's birthday (which this year turned into a ten day fest), present getting and giving, wrapping, baking, entertaining, and throw work in to the mix... yes, I'm one busy girl.

For a few minutes yesterday, I thought about how busy I am. And then I thought.... how LUCKY I am.  

I am lucky enough to have so much family that it takes six separate Christmas's to fit them all in.

I am lucky enough to have a husband that is loved so much he gets a ten day span of dinners, parties, and get together's.

I am lucky enough to have such good friends that I want to see, and who want to see me.

I am lucky enough to have some money (as little as it is!) to purchase gifts for the people I love.

I am lucky enough to have a job that I enjoy going to, and am doubly lucky for the fact that I am in an industry that should only employ their staff for the summer, but the snow is flying and I am still getting a paycheck!

I am lucky enough to have a warm and cozy house (complete with wood stove!) that is perfect for entertaining.

I am one lucky (or maybe blessed) girl.

So for the rest of the holiday season, I won't be thinking negatively at the busyness of the season.... but how awesome it is to have such a full and great life!

Cheers to the Holidays!

Fascinating? Really?

For its eighteenth year, Barbara Walters' "10 Most Fascinating People" was on a couple of nights ago.  

On the list of people we apparently found the most fascinating of 2011, were the likes of Katy Perry and The Kardashians.

This depresses me.  

All we have to show for 2011 are a pop singer that shoots whipped cream out of her bra and 3 sisters that are famous because one of them had a sex tape once.

I looked up what "Fascinating" means.

Definition: "of great interest or attraction; enchanting; charming; captivating"

Would I consider the Kardashian's captivating? Train wreck maybe - but enchanting? No.

What I find fascinating is Barbara Walter's voice. That lady has one odd (but dare I say charming?) voice.

I can't tell if all of this is a step up from 2010's Jersey Shore Cast, which made the list last year.

I will say however, that I think Barbs got it right with Steve Jobs taking top spot as this year's most fascinating person.  She had to break her own rule (everyone on the list has to be living), but the exception was a good one. 

 It gave me hope that maybe next year, the word fascinating will be taken a bit more seriously? 

(Or else I am fully expecting that dog that skateboards to make the 2012 list.)

"Innovation distinguishes between a leader and a follower" - Steve Jobs

Changing It Up

For those of you who read my blog (thanks Mom), you may have noticed that the title has changed. Yay changes!

I was never particularly fond of "Carling's Chapter", a little cutesy with the alliteration, and had a definite lack of creativity.  

Course Language hit me like a ton of bricks a few days ago.  

"Course" is my last name.  A name I had to earn, not one I was born into.  I love the name (minus the occasional d-bag who reminds me not to call my future child "Inter".... really? You think you're a genius because you put Inter and Course together? Really?)

Course Language seemed to fit where my blog has been heading... a little rough around the edges, but (I hope) witty none the less.

And the tag line comes from a moment on that same day when I was liberally applying my black eye liner at 8AM and started to wonder if there was ever a time when black eye liner was innappropriate. (The answer - no.)

Blogs are an interesting thing - they are a gateway into your life that might not be there otherwise.

I love writing mine, and I love it even more now that the name reflects more of who I am.

Prepare yourself for continued important opinions.

The Song that Killed Christmas

Can I get "Old Lady Prude" on you all for a moment?

Today I was in the mall doing a little Christmas shopping.  

I'm in the mood, I'm happy, I'm getting all "jingle bell rock" up in here. 

I had finished putting up my Christmas village in the house earlier in the day, and was happy it was Christmastime!

And then.... I heard this song on a store's speakers.

Excuse my text lingo profanity but.... WTF.

Can I just take you through some of these outrageous lyrics?

Light me up, put me on top, let's fa-la-la-la-la-la-la
(I'll never look at the star on the top of our Christmas tree the same again)

The only place you'll want to be is underneath my Christmas tree
(Actually, the only place I want you is far FAR away from underneath my Christmas tree - it's clean under there, let's keep it that way)


Ho(e) Ho(e) Ho(e), under the mistletoe.... yes everyone knows, we will take off our clothes.
(Sigh, it was only a matter of time before Santa's greeting turned into hooker slang, and please, keep your clothes ON, this is a family party...)


My Christmas tree's delicious.
(What? Gross.)

____________________________________________________________________________________________


When did Christmas become another word for sex?

I was actually embarrassed in the store because I had just finished having a lovely conversation with a lovely (read untainted by all things unholy) older woman, and then I had to endure the "taking off your clothes" nonsense while she was still in the same aisle. It was unbearable.


Please Lady Gaga, stop the crazyiness. 

Time to Silent Your Night.