Carl I-N-G

A small word on store room change rooms & sales associates.

STOP ASKING ME WHAT MY NAME IS WHEN ALL I WANT TO DO IS TRY ON A 

T-SHIRT.

I have what you might call an "unusual name".

When I am running into a store (obviously in a hurry) to try on a plain white t-shirt that I know more than likely will fit, having to tell the woman putting me in the change room what my name is puts me in an immediate bad mood.

This is how it goes, EVERY time.

Me: "Hi, can I try this on quick?"

Overly Bubbly Change Room Lady: "Hi Hun! Of course! You can have change room 1." 

(side bar - we are the same age, stop calling me "Hun")

Me: "Great"

O.B.C.R.L: "Can I just get your name?"

Me: "Carling"

O.B.C.R.L: "What?"

Me: "Carling"

O.B.C.R.L: "Carly?"

Me: "Nope, Carl-ING"

O.B.C.R.L: (confused) "Carl...ine?"

Me: NO. Carling. I-N-G at the end.

O.B.C.R.L: "What a GREAT name! OMG!"

Me: (Hating my life and this girl) "Can I just try this on. For the Love of God please."

Do not get me wrong - I LOVE my name. 

Completely, totally, 100% love my name. Thank you Mom & Dad for giving it to me!! 

Seriously, I can't imagine going through life without a unique name.

But from now on, when I walk into Dynomite, my name is Mary.

Fact #1: Mary is the most common name for a woman in the United States

Fact #2: My name doesn't even make the top 1000, which makes me so happy!

"I don't remember anybody's name. How do you think the "dahling" thing got started?"
- Zsa Zsa Gabor 

Don't Believe The Hype

Last night I finally saw the movie Bridesmaids.

And I hate to tell everyone this - but it wasn't that good.

Wow, if the word "over hype" ever applied to anything, it is this movie.

I heard that it was the best movie (from some people) EVER, and that the hilarity rivaled that of Wedding Crashers and The Hangover. Are you kidding me?

Don't get me wrong, it wasn't that it was the worst movie I've ever seen...

(this definitely is the worst movie I've ever seen)

But it just wasn't THAT funny.

I giggled a couple of times, but almost because I think I wanted so badly to love the movie, and I think I thought that if i LOLed, my brain would somehow agree that indeed the movie is as hilarious as everyone says.

Kristen Wiig, I love you. I just didn't love this movie.

(One of my favourite Kristen Wiig characters)

One of the redeeming qualities was the comedic talents of this guy (Chris O'Dowd).

He was great - and rockin' that amazing Irish accent.

I feel like people are going to come at me with hate for this opinion, and I'm sorry.

I really tried to like it.

I even started watching it again with the "unrated" version thinking that maybe I had somehow stumbled onto the lamer PG version.

Not the case.

Sorry!

Oprah Who?

 -This Just In -

Oprah is out... Anderson is so IN.

 Sorry Oprah, I really do like you, but Anderson has taken my talk show breath away. 

His first show was a week ago today, and from the beginning, I have been hooked.

This silver fox of a man is funny, intelligent, witty, and I've already seen him cry on the show.

GOLD!

In all seriousness though, I am really excited to see what he'll be capable of doing through a talk show - he has so much to offer through all of his incredible journalism experience, and he has been a completely refreshing change of pace.

"Follow Your Bliss" - Gloria Vanderbilt (Anderson Cooper's Mom)

Too Skinny?

I am a big Jennifer Hudson fan. While I'm not a listener of her music, I think she's talented, gorgeous, and seems extremely genuine.

However - lately, when I've seen pictures of her I'm not seeing the happy, beautiful woman I used to see.

There is definitely such thing as "too skinny", and I think she could now be the poster girl for how a lot of weight loss can look unattractive.

I was really impressed with her initial weight loss - that's a great accomplishment.  But, as usual with Hollywood, she's taken the pursuit of "beauty" to an extreme that I would consider unhealthy.

Her weight loss makes me angry.  It makes me angry for people like myself who look more like a "before" Jennifer Hudson than an "after".  

I fail to see the problem with this picture.

I didn't realize my hands have to fit completely around my waist to be beautiful and happy. 

I wish this was still okay, but apparently it's just not good enough.

"Everyone is unique. Compare not yourself with anyone else lest you spoil God's curriculum." 

- Baal Shem Tov

I'm trying Baal, I'm trying.

The Funeral

This might be one of my all time favourite songs.

Top five most definitely.

Listening to it for the first time changed my life, as cheesy as that is.

I could listen to it on repeat, forever.

Enjoy.

The Funeral - Band of Horses

 "To know me as hardly golden,

Is to know me all wrong..."

Trial By Hair

My hair has caused me such grief over the years.

Too long, too short, too curly, too uncurly, not enough wave. Too dark, too light, too "what the hell colour is this", too oily, too dry.  Too many roots, not enough layers, way too many layers, nightmare bangs, not enough bangs.

Insanity in follicle form. Sigh.

For me, the "grass is always greener on the other side" saying has ALWAYS applied to my hair situation. When my hair is long, every girl I see with short hair is unbelievably smokin' hot.  When my hair is short, long hair is the only possible thing that can make me sexy.

You may see where this post is going - I want to cut my hair.  
My hair is sitting nicely just passed my shoulders, and I'm finally getting some length to these strands.  Length I desperately started going for 2 years ago, when my hair was doing that "short in the back/long in the front" 'do that was way too trendy at the time.

So what do I do? Do I get over myself, realize that hair is, after all, JUST hair, and go for it?

Or do I keep it long because I've been growing it for so long, and it looks okay? (Read okay. Not "super fab" or "extra amazing".)

A friend and I have the hair conversation almost constantly - we are what you might call hair soul sisters.  She says go for it, but I can see behind those brown eyes of hers the doubt - the "but your hair is long, what if you regret it? What if it's not what you expect? What if it looks amazing and then I start feeling like I too should cut my long hair?"

I think if my hair could like this on a daily basis, I would like my long hair more.

Yah. Complete with constant wind fan. Blake Lively - I hate you.

A few pictures of what I'm thinking about anyways.

Right? How gorgeous is she.

Please. It doesn't get much sexier.

This colour and cut make me want to kill myself, they are both amazing.

Dilemma, Dilemma, Dilemma.

"And forget not that the earth delights to feel your bare feet and the winds long to play with your hair*." - Khalil Gibran

*I think that refers to long or short, so maybe it's time to get over myself, and just be happy.

Pillow Talk

One of the decorating items on my wish list are awesome decorative pillows.

My husband, like most men, does not understand why pillows cause me such happiness, but as a woman (and I'm sorry, but I'm making this gender stereotype!) decorative pillows are the bomb.

So for now, my excitement about pillows will have to be in photo form, as they are not an inexpensive decorative option. (Yes, I'm sure I could make them, and maybe one day, when I magically turn into one of those Martha Stewart-esque housewives, I'll give 'er a go.)

Also on my wish list - to become one of those Martha Stewart-esque housewives.

This golden yellow colour has been driving me crazy lately, I love it!

 These pillows make me want to have a baby boy right now - that's how much I love pillows.

I feel like you can never go wrong decorating with words. I'm a big (huge actually) word fan.

Bikes? Owls? Words? Kill me, I love these so much.

 Lovely.

Classic, simple, gorge! 

"You're better than the best,
I'm lucky just to linger in your light
Cooler than the flip side 
Of my pillow..." - Uncle Kracker

Change, Schmange

Have you ever noticed that people who claim to "LOVE" change, really only love when things in their life change for the positive?

Like, I don't know many people who adore the change in their hair when it gets cut 5 inches shorter than expected, or turns a hideous shade of gray instead of "Light, Lustrous Ash Blond" like the box says.

But if you get the perfect cut, the promotion at work gives you an extra week's vacay (PLUS a raise, just for fun!), or the house your newly renting has a thousand dollars stashed in the wall.... change is JUST THE BEST! 

I have so much experience with this because I am one of these annoying "only like change when it's positive" type people.  

This is a bummer because I assumed I was one of those "really love any kind of change" type people. (Side bar - it's not that fun when you realize something about yourself you don't really like.)

I've got a lot of changes going on in my life right now - most negative.  No, this doesn't mean I'm terribly unhappy, just not dealing well with the changes.

I'm trying, like really hard, to not be afraid.

"Change in all things is sweet." - (get over yourself) Aristotle 


This might take a while.